Wiki-card friends.

Over the weekend I met up for 3 different groups of people. It's really unlike me to have so many gatherings because I'm just a person who does not enjoy frequent get togethers. Friday, Saturday & Sunday - a different group each time. Yet something that struck me was how our conversations revolved around the same things over and over again. So for 3 days straight, I repeated the same story over and over again, each time wondering if it was really that interesting that people had to know about it. Each time I repeated it, I shortened it and finally, I summarised it to just a couple of lines. Surprisingly, even though my answers got shorter, the reactions I got each time were pretty much the same. That's when I started to wonder if people just like asking such questions - about your life, what you're doing, how's your job etc, but are not really listening to your answers, nor do they take a genuine interest in what you're saying.

It reminded me of a quote from one of my favourite books - The Little Prince.

Grown-ups love figures. When you tell them that you have made a new friend, they never ask you any questions about essential matters. They never say to you, “What does his voice sound like? What games does he love best? Does he collect butterflies?” Instead, they demand: “How old is he? How many brothers has he? How much does he weigh? How much money does his father make?” Only from these figures do they think they have learned anything about him.

 The Little Prince

It's really amazing how this excerpt completely expresses my thoughts. Everything has to be quantified, we then pass judgment based on our standards and how we rank these quantities. Sometimes I feel like we're just compiling wiki-cards on our friends - A has a job that earns him $XX, B is XX in XX company, C has XX and XX, drives XX. An information card. Have we really stopped wanting to know people other than for their possessions and titles? How about his favourite colour? What he likes to eat? What dreams/ambitions does he have? What is his favourite movie and why? And books? Habits? What makes him, him. Seeking to understand his character rather than just quantifiable information.

We've become so superficial. Equipped with these wiki-cards, we think we know a person, and then we judge them. Everyone has something to say, some judgment to pass, but never on themselves. Sometimes I think it's unfair to judge someone based on your standards and conclude that they don't make the cut. Why impose on others your views and standards when you don't listen to theirs? It's sometimes hard to contain your views, especially when you feel strongly about something. But there really is a line to be drawn between when an opinion is just an opinion, and when an opinion becomes judgmental.

Don't look back in anger

It's interesting to look back and see how you've changed over the years. After a couple of knocks here and there, some unhappy experiences, some heart breaks, people inevitably change.

Funny how the more you try to stand out from the crowd, the more you fade in, and the harder you try to blend in, the more you are noticed.

I'm drawn to people who have a story to tell. It could be about their their art, interest, or just about their mundane everyday life. The beauty of such stories is the realness in it. The lack of pretentiousness. They have nothing to prove.

They just keep on moving forward even if people don't agree with them. They are happy the way they are - leading a very simple life that matters only to them and whoever they're sharing their happiness with.

It's way too tiring to base your self worth on someone else's opinion. That would make you a person of little value as you are only as good as people think you are.

Music - Lenka, Dangerous and sweet

Been listening to this song on loop for a while now. It's such a cute song. Love is dangerous and sweet indeed. Nothing too dramatic or too suspicious. Just how it should be - playful, youthful, a little insecure, defensive, and also hurtful at times.

I should put on my armor the next time I see you
So I won't be harmed. I know I can shoot my own arrows.

Art - Handfalls by Ichi Ikeda

Paid the Art Science Museum  a visit 2 weeks back and one display that really caught my attention was  Handfalls - by Ichi Ikeda in the reflecting lily pond. It gave me a sense of calm and something to ponder about - even if not about his original message. It's admirable for a person to have such a strong sense of meaning and purpose in their life. It is really difficult to have that and many people, myself included, live a mediocre life with no purpose. It worries me that I may never find this meaning and purpose, and may end up leading a life of repetition where I'm just doing, instead of experiencing and growing.

Created in collaboration with DAW International, HANDFALLS is a kinetic installation with floating images of blooming lotus flowers and hands holding clear water, which combine with light reflections echoing from pond’s surface on to the buildings façade. Using the imagery of hands and lotus flowers, the project sends a strong message: “let’s create a new landscape for the future from here and now and contemplate the idea of a renewed relationship between the nature and the human beings”. The multiple images of hands holding clean water suggests that this water is perhaps not only the very same that grows the leaves and flower of lotus landscape created out of floating photographic images, but the hands themselves stand for a society fully loaded with hope and wishing for a good future. Joined, the images of natural flowers and human hands depict a new kind of a landscape woven by both nature and human crafts, hinting us all to find what the artists has called the “primary relations” between our life and surrounding environment, in order for it to become one and the same.
Digital Art Weeks (DAW)

Food - Verandah @ Gardens by the Bay

14 May 2013

It's nice to be able to lunch with your family on a weekday. Often times we get so caught up with our work that it seems almost impossible to get together for lunch because of time constrains.  We're pretty lucky to be able to do this often enough when we do pick the kids up from school. They're really excited when my parents pick them because it always means that they get to go out for lunch. Their simplicity of looking forward to have a loved one pick them up because they're excited to go out with them is really sweet. I think a lot of times now when someone picks us we're happy because it's a convenience to us more than us being excited to see them.

X-posted to glutTANs where we usually talk more about the food we had

Food - Le Cuisson

2nd May 2013

I much prefer the beginning of months to the end of months. Could be that it signifies, in some ways, new beginnings and being able to start on a fresh sheet. Even if it isn't so, I still feel fresher at the beginning just knowing it's the 1st. It allows me to let go of whatever baggage has been building up over the past month, and is a constant reminder to relax and just let all that unnecessary feelings go. 

For some odd reason J was very chirpy that day. Normally I would be angry with him over that odd reason, but he was just too happy and refreshed I couldn't bring myself to be a wet blanket. On days that I do manage to relax and take things less seriously, I actually find myself smiling a lot more.

X-posted to glutTANs

For our thoughts on all the food that we eat

#EatSingaporeFood

I'm getting sick of having all day breakfasts. It used to be interesting to visit all these new brunch places with such nicely done up spaces. The food was really secondary, the decor and company was the cake + icing I'd sit in a corner and enjoy my tea and spend some time with my family or with JR. Just like that, spending such quality time actually talking to each other and trying to understand more of people's thoughts and days. 

Somehow along the way, it turned into a mini race - to go to all the must go food places, to take Instagram worthy food pictures. Now the icing was getting many likes for said Instagram photos. I won't deny I like those good food pictures, I like going to new places; but I was slowly losing myself to  FakeBooking* (A new term I read from the papers today! Where people only post the good things and never show/tell you the bad behind it). Sometimes the food taste bad, but it still looks good. Instagram does that - it makes bad tasting food look good. Food for the eye, if I may say. 

It really only hit me over dinner with my family last night. I was not having a good day and really just wanted to enjoy a simple dinner. Imagine my dread when the camera was whipped out! Not again! Having to let the camera eat before me. Yup, a daily occurrence. For no reason, out of no where, I just felt unhappy that every single meal had to be documented. Yes, I have a food blog (I don't really want to classify it as a food blog), but I started it just so I could share about food places, and the happy moments that we shared as a family. Instead of enjoying the moment, I was busy snapping food pictures and missing out on seeing the faces of my family. I made them wait before eating just so I could take a food photo. This wasn't the kind of family time I wanted. I wasn't spending proper time with my family. I wasn't enjoying my food. I was sharing this joy/food and trying to impress people who, really, didn't matter as much. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I really should spend more time with the things that really matter to me, and not what people make me think is important to me. I'm going to put in a constant effort to not be a FakeBooker and instead spend more time enjoying my time spent with my family. Just me and the little moments that I will share with my loved ones. I'm sure JR will be very happy :)

Rid yourself of vanity and #EatSingaporeFood. 

I love Singapore food! No pretence, no posing. Just good comfort food.